Maw Books

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I’m thrilled to interview Jean Reagan, a local Utah author whom I’ve had the pleasure of chatting with in person a couple of times.  I swear if I make it up to the Teton National Park I must have Jean Reagan as my guide.  I’ve just reviewed Jean’s picture book Always My Brother which was written after the death of her own nineteen-year-old son and is a fantastic book for children who are grieving for their own siblings.  I hope that you’ll welcome Jean today!

Maw Books:  Hi Jean!  Always My Brother is a very personal book for you which was inspired after the death of your nineteen year old son. Can you tell us more about that?   Why this story?  Why now?  Did it help your family through the grieving process to write about it?

Jean Reagan: Following a challenging year four years ago, we lost our son John to a drug overdose.  Initially it was very difficult to re-form our family as a threesome; the absence of John dominated every aspect of life.  By now I think we have successfully recreated ourselves as a family of three, even though we still miss John, of course.  As I portrayed a healing family in my book, I felt hope for us, as well.

I write picture books and I knew there was a need for one about sibling loss.  This project helped pull me out of my initial paralysis following John’s death.  My husband has not and will not read the book, because he knows for him it would be too painful.  I’m okay with that.  Following John’s death, HE wrote the obituary and HE gave talks about drug addiction.  There was no way I could have done either.  We all do what we can, and don’t do what we can’t.  Being gentle with ourselves and each other is so important.

Maw Books:  Always My Brother is about the often unrecognized grief of siblings.  Did you receive feedback from your daughter while you were writing it?

Jean Reagan: My daughter Jane wanted to see the story only after it was a completed book, when as she said, “I know I can’t change anything.”  Squeezing a true story into a fiction picture book requires decisions and choices that she recognized might be painful for her.  Jane did name the characters in the book.  (Having a sister and brother named “John” and “Jane” would just seem too unbelievable!)  She kept her brother’s name and for the sister chose “Becky” who is a dear, dear friend to Jane and our whole family.

Maw Books:  What type of research, if any, went into Always My Brother? Was it written solely on your personal experience or did you reach out to others to make sure that you got the “it” factor just right?

Jean Reagan: I interviewed therapists, grief counselors, teachers, librarians, parents who had lost children, people who had lost siblings as children, and a director of a children’s grief center (The Sharing Place).  Many of them also critiqued the manuscript.  Three adult grief books were helpful:  The Empty Room, A Broken Heart Still Beats, and Comfort: A Journey Through Grief. I even interviewed a woman who has a three-legged dog to make sure my depiction was accurate and respectful.

Tilbury House Publishers create Teachers Take Note guides to expand the content of all their children’s books.  They extensively research the topic and post these guides on their website.

Maw Books:  What was the hardest part about writing a book that draws so deeply into your personal experience and grief?  Was there a greatest joy about it as well?

Jean Reagan: By far, the hardest part was the after-the-party scene where Becky feels bad that she “forgot to miss John.”  How should the mom respond?  Whoa!  That went through many, many revisions.  I had to dig deeper and deeper emotionally as a writer and as a mother.  The second hardest part was the ending.  I wanted the family to show some healing, but I didn’t want to erroneously convey that they were “all better now.”  Some children’s books about loss so desperately want a happy ending that I feel they error on the side of “we-planted-a-tree or we-got-a-replacement-puppy, so we’re all better now.”  I wanted Always My Brother to offer hope, but only realistic hope.  I still grapple with whether I found the ideal balance.

When I first saw the sketches for the book, I had to catch my breath because they forced me to revisit my own painful weeks following John’s death.  That’s how accurately the illustrator, Phyllis Pollema-Cahill, “got it.”

One unexpected joy I experienced writing this story was that I could rewind John’s life to a younger, happy and healthy period before he was tortured by drug addiction.  This experience was, of course, tinged with a bittersweet sadness, too.   I find comfort, too, knowing that perhaps my book can help lessen the pain experienced by bereaved families.  This thought makes me smile.

Maw Books:  Your unexpected joy makes me smile.  I noticed that in the book there is no indication as to the cause of John’s death nor was there any scenes of a funeral or burial.  Can you go into the thought process on why you chose to write it that way?

Jean Reagan: Because there are very, very few picture books about sibling loss, I wanted my book to be accessible to as many children as possible, for the story to be universal.  The picture book format allows for only a limited number of scenes, so each one had to be absolutely core to the story and my overall goal of portraying a family’s healing process.  Often books and media focus on the details of a death and ignore the grieving and healing that follows it.  Therapists and bereaved people will tell you, “It doesn’t matter how/why someone died.  What matters is the loss.”  In fact, at my son’s memorial service my daughter said, “I don’t want John to be known just for how he died, but for who he was.”  I wanted to honor her, because I think she’s right.  For all these reasons I chose to leave out the cause of death.

Originally I did have a funeral scene, but I took that out for two reasons. One, what accurately reflects the dramatic shift in life for a surviving sibling is not the funeral, but how the home fills with people.  Then the home scene returns to “normal” which of course is no longer normal at all.  Two, a funeral scene would inadvertently exclude some religious traditions.  I wanted this story to leave open the possibility of all religious traditions.  (Just last week my book was read amongst adult students at the Jewish Theological Seminary in New York when they suffered an unexpected loss.)

Despite the limited number of pages in a picture book, my editor, Audrey Maynard, wanted the final scene to be wordless.  An illustration-only page gives readers a pause before they transition out of the story.  Wonderful!

Maw Books:  Obviously, children who have lost a sibling to death will react differently to your book than those who have not. Can you talk a little bit about your target audience and what you hope children will take away from the book?

Jean Reagan: My primary target audience is children who have lost a sibling.  I wanted to honor their loss by portraying and affirming their often confusing, contradictory emotions.  And, I wanted to offer realistic hope that with the passage of time the gripping, paralyzing pain would ease, as they continue to honor and cherish their loved one. I also wanted to create opportunities for shared conversation because grieving can often be an isolated, lonely experience.

My second target audience is people surrounding the bereaved family—friends, classmates, teachers, neighbors, etc.  I wanted to provide a window for them to understand the internal grief of the family.  Hopefully, this would foster courage in them to reach out to the bereaved child and family.

But I hope my book is helpful broadly.  People of all ages can find comfort in it for all kinds of losses, I think.

Maw Books:  What are some books that you would recommend to those who are grieving?

Jean Reagan: Besides the adult books I mentioned earlier, for young children I would recommend Saying Goodbye to Lulu, Freddy the Leaf, Goodbye, Mousie, and Grandad Bill’s Song.

Maw Books:  If I’m not mistaken, Always My Brother is your debut picture book. Has writing always been an interest of yours or did you find that it was an new outlet for you after the death of your son?  Why start writing books now?

Jean Reagan: I have been writing children’s books for about six years.  All my other manuscripts are very lighthearted by comparison!  When I told my daughter about my acceptance phone call for a manuscript she immediately asked, “Which one?”  When I told her it was this one, she hugged me hard and said, “That’s the one I wanted.”  I couldn’t agree with her more!

I just signed a contract with Knopf for my next picture book, How to Babysit a Grandpa.  (May, 2011).  It’s wonderful to send a purely happy, silly book into the world, as well.

Maw Books:  I love that title.  How to Babysit a Grandpa! Describe yourself as a reader. What books influenced and inspired you as a child?  What book are you currently reading now and another that you just finished and would recommend.

Jean Reagan: As a child, reading was difficult for me.  It wasn’t until third grade, that Smiling Hill Farm unlocked the magic for me.  I can still feel that excitement.  Another book that captured me as a child, I read in Japanese.  It wasn’t until a high school English class that I realized the story was King Lear!

I just finished a delightful mid-grade novel, Jungle Crossing, by Sydney Salter.  Her characters’ honesty and humor remind me of the early books in Phyllis Reynolds Naylor’s Alice series.  I’m in the middle of Bobbie Pyron’s compelling YA novel, The Ring.  (Full disclosure:  I critiqued an early version of the manuscript three years ago.) I’m wowed by how Bobbie and her editor transformed this powerful story about a troubled teenage girl who takes up boxing.

It’s a good thing I’m in an adult book group, because otherwise I’d never read an adult book.  Speaking of book groups, my daughter and I were in a mother/daughter book group for nine years.  I SO recommend parents organize similar opportunities with their children.  And remember it’s a chance to act silly, be honest, and have a blast, NOT to analyze literature!

Maw Books:  Your personal background is fascinating. You grew up in Japan, have now lived in Salt Lake City for 25 years and spend every summer as backcountry volunteers in the Grand Teton National Park without water or electricity.  Can you tell us some more about your background, your interests, and what  you do when you’re not writing?

Jean Reagan: I think everyone has a fascinating background!  They’re two unifying things through out my life:  I love nature and I love connecting with people.  So, my absolutely favorite thing is hiking with other people!

Maw Books:  I’m sure you have some crazy stories from spending summers up in the Tetons.  I’d love it if you’d share a really crazy but true story with us.

Jean Reagan: Once when I was alone at the cabin, I spotted a cougar nearby along the lakeshore.  Not knowing how dangerous cougars can be, I got in the canoe and paddled within fifteen feet and watched it through the bushes.  I even saw it move a kit by the scruff of its neck.  Later, feeling a little spooked, I forgo my evening dip in the lake and used a “chamber pot” instead of the outhouse fifty feet behind the cabin.
The next morning when I went to the outhouse, there were fresh paw prints four feet up on three sides of the outhouse.   I immediately hiked to a high spot where we have cellphone reception and called the chief biologist.  He said the paw prints were most likely bear, not cougar, so I felt relieved.  Be then as he signed off he said, “Oh, and with cougars, don’t play dead.  Fight them off with all you’ve got.  Have a nice day!  Bye!”  Yikes!  You can bet I did NOT have a nice day!  Fortunately, that’s the only cougar I’ve ever seen, although I know they’re around.

Maw Books:  One of my features on my blog is to ask each author I interview for a recipe which I’ll then make and blog about later. Would you mind sharing with us one of your favorite recipes?

Jean Reagan:

“Radical” Spinach Casserole

Mix together:
two 10-oz frozen spinach, thawed
three eggs
one cup shredded extra sharp cheddar cheese
one fourth cup of melted margarine (or canola oil)
twenty-four ounces of cottage cheese
three tablespoons of flour
three teaspoons of nutmeg
juice from one lemon

Bake in a  9 by 14 glass pan at 350 degrees for about one hour.  Serve with lemon slices.

I bring this casserole to every writers’ retreat!  The recipe is called “radical” because it originated with potlucks organized by activists during the Great Depression.

Maw Books:  I love spinach! I can’t wait to make it.  So what’s next?  What are you currently working on and when can we see another book published from you?

Jean Reagan: Besides the Knopf book due out in May, 2011 I’m working on a picture book about a dog who’s scared to swim, one about a mom who has a disastrous day, and one about a mom who is lacking in the “fancy” department.  All, fun silly stories!

Maw Books:  Anything else that you’d like to share with the readers of the Maw Books Blog that I didn’t cover?

Jean Reagan: If you want to find out more about the true story behind Always My Brother, or my childhood in Japan, or my life as a park ranger in Grand Tetons National Park, visit my website, www.jeanreagan.com.  To access the Teachers Take Note guide for helping bereaved children, visit Tilbury House Publishers’ website.

Maw Books:  Thank you Jean!! I’m definitely going to get in touch when we make a trip up to the Tetons!

Tilbury house is giving away copies of Always My Brother.  Check out details on how to enter and read my review of Always My Brother.

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